I’m back from LA, and at the same time, it feels like I’m still there, or like I never even left in the first place years ago.

Time can be weird like that.

As a kid, my cousin Karla and I were inseparable. We brought out each other’s weird. We would dress each other in ridiculous clothes and make each other walk to neighbor’s houses and ring the doorbell asking for things like a packet of dry JELL-O mix, or a cowboy hat, or a plastic spoon. For nothing other than our own amusement.

Ahhh, small town 90s kids, and the entertainment we had to provide ourselves.

There was this one stretch of time in our family’s church where Karla and I started going up to adults after the service and asking, robotically, “What is time?”

We thought we were so clever. Like we were stumping people four times our age with a philosophical question, which we guessed they would answer with what the time was.

We were correct on both. A confused youth pastor said “It’s 11:22,” to which we replied, “No, what IS time?” … and he just walked away.

Sometimes time is too big a question, even for people who’ve lived a fair amount of it.

Time is a tricky one to grasp. It’s also not that deep or complicated.

“Time isn’t linear,” they say. Except it kind of is. It only moves forward. One direction (apparently today’s the day for nods at pop stars of yesteryear) — no rewinding, pausing, or skipping the hard-to-watch parts.

Sometimes, you can be somewhere and not be there at all. You can spend years in one place — a city, a job, a relationship — and realize you’ve been waiting the whole time for it to feel like home.

I often find myself looking back at where I once was and asking “Did that even happen?? That feels like it’s not even my story anymore.”

Here's what I know now that kid-me didn't: eventually, time stops being a philosophical question and starts being a deadline.

At some point, "someday" becomes "why not now?" And "I'll figure it out eventually" turns into "I’m done waiting."

I'm 40. And something shifted recently — not in a crisis way, but in a clarity way. Time isn't infinite. And I’m in a place now more than ever where I don’t have time for maintaining things that don't serve where I’m headed with what I’ve got left.

That's the crossroads. Not a decision between two clear paths, but a choice to make space for what’s trying to arrive.

I mean, one thing we know about time is we definitely don’t have it to waste…

The Hustle

A wise mentor once told me, you’re a decision away from changing your life.

I mean, that’s really all life is: a series of decisions that makes your entire experience on this earth. Why not make the decision to have it be awesome?

I used to write down quotes I heard and loved on my kitchen wall in LA with a sharpie… a wall that is now covered and lived in by my ex and his family. But thankfully I took photos before moving out:

Those words are still on the wall of that 100 year old building in LA, hiding under paint, potentially to be unveiled in another 100 years during a remodel as a relic of a time that once was. But I know I’m the one that put them there. And they’ve stuck with me since I wrote them down and stared at them every morning behind the stove while making slightly burned eggs. (To be fair, I like slightly burnt food. I blame my mother’s cooking.)

I enjoy making big and bold decisions, especially if they scare me a little.

There were a few things I decided would happen this year that happened without me even knowing how they would… and there are things on that list that I'm not ready to announce yet, but they're coming, because I already decided they are.

The hard part isn't making the decision. The hard part is trusting it after you've made it, or following through. Believing that the dominos you set in motion will actually fall the way you hoped. And speaking of things falling into place...

The Chill

I didn’t go into my TEDx talk with any specific expectations, other than to write what I felt was the right thing to say.

I got some cool news my last day in LA while pulling off the Universal lot (more to come on this), but the TED team has selected my talk as an “Editor’s pick” — meaning it has been identified as one to share on their platforms as a “valuable and timely idea for their global audience.”

Apparently, this is a very high honor, and 1-2% of talks are selected in this manner. This means my talk’s release will be slightly delayed, as they are currently developing a publishing strategy to maximize impact.

Sometimes things just land with the right people at just the right time.

Life had been a shitstorm leading up to writing this talk. And if I hadn’t been through those experiences, maybe I wouldn’t have gotten the words out that resonated with people so well…

Maybe the hard parts were the curriculum. Living the experience. You can't talk about laughter healing brokenness if you haven't had your heart shattered a few dozen times. You can't give people permission to make the hard choice if you're not willing to make it yourself.

For the sake of time — because it's not infinite, because we don't get unlimited chances to build the life we want — sometimes you have to let the shitstorm teach you what it came to teach you. And then you have to decide: what gets to stay, and what do I leave behind?

I'm figuring that out in real time. And apparently, so is everyone else.

So if you're at your own crossroads — the kind that's even more poorly written than a shitty Britney Spears movie — maybe this is your sign. Time's ticking. Time to make some decisions.

Upcoming Shows

When I list shows, I list some of what I have coming up to give you options to see me… but the ones that really matter are headlining dates, of course. These dates are directly impacting our bottom line as performers, and they’re the ones where the audiences get to see the full show.

THESE are the dates I need help pushing. Thank you in advance 🙂 

Nov 6th: Headlining the Crescent Theater in Mobile, Alabama

Nov 7th: Headlining The Howlin’ Wolf in New Orleans, Louisiana

Other fun shows:

October 29th: The Vixen Theater in McHenry, Illinois

October 30th: iO Chicago — Chris Jones and I met at an entrepreneur/creator event in Chicago, and he was on the TED global pitch stage the same day I spoke for TEDx. He was featured on AGT, and this show will include a mix of his renowned and hilarious hypnotism with my improv fuckery… super unique and fun one to come to!

November 1st: Laugh Factory Chicago — if you’re coming to this one email me and I’ll guest list you!

Love you all and cheers to the hustle + chill. We cross the road to get to the other side? (yes we’re ending on a dumb Chicken joke — why not.)

xx NPH